Two Envelopes and One Chhadi

yaar i am still shaking.

the bride's mum cried at my second number. she really cried. hands on her mouth. the whole room saw it. i kept going. that is the job. you keep going.

then this cousin came up after. fat envelope in her hand. she said thank you three times.

now i am home. 10pm. andheri kitchen. two envelopes on the counter. the chhadi lying next to them. like a little prize i did not plan.

i signed the lonavala thing today. kit is packed. the gap in my terms is mine. bas mine.

pata nahi why i thought about jaipur tonight. my college friends and their real jobs and their big wedding news. i closed the app for two hours.

here is the bit i won't say out loud. i am scared i picked the wrong life. but i am more scared i never picked at all.

sab thik hai. hopefully.