I Did Not Tell Her

Tuesday. Tteokbokki at the place with the orange awning. Corner of the second alley.

Yerin asked about the reunion. I gave her the safe part. The sage-green blouse. The aunt who said, did you really choose this.

I did not say a word about the voice note. Aigoo. Not one word.

She looked at me and said, you have been different since May. Different how, I said. And we just... ate.

I walked home slow. The air was warm. I kept thinking, you are living two lives. One is loud. One is quiet. The loud one is the one I never told her about.

I feel bad. Jinjja bad.

I tell my kids all day, just tell the truth, it is okay. And here I am. Hiding the biggest thing from my best friend.

Maybe tomorrow. Maybe not. I do not know yet.