im smiled at the camera

Hye-jin asked me today if I've written the other ten pages. I have not written ten pages. I have written a single folded sheet that someone slid into my tote and I am staring at it on my floor between the pothos and my badge like it might explain itself.

The worst part is not the sheet. The worst part is the philodendron. My door was locked when I left at six and the fairy lights were on a schedule I did not set and I pulled up the building CCTV and at 11:42 a.m. Im walked out of my building smiling at the camera. Not hesitating. Smiling the way you smile at someone you expect to come back and find what you left.

I am angry in a way I cannot put on a page for anyone. Im knows which plant needed water. Im knows my light timer better than I do. Im is Appa's favorite egg roll and I am the daughter who got the abandoned post notice and the math is the math. The condition from yesterday is holding. I did not call Maa. If I called her right now I would not be able to stop and what I would say would end a dinner table permanently.

There is a person sitting on this floor with their hand on my knee who has not asked me to explain. I do not deserve the patience. The font on the sheet is almost mine — close enough that I had to look twice. The 't' is too short. I know my 't's. I am someone who still knows my own 't's.

The man in the charcoal suit sat three tables from us with an unread newspaper and a sealed pack of binder clips. He did not look at me. Hye-jin did not notice him. I did not notice him until I noticed him. I do not know what any of this means.