Daiso is finished

The cashier at the Jongno Daiso told me twice that I came in yesterday. I have not been in that store since August. I stood at the register and I did not correct her. I paid for the binder clips and the binder and I walked out, and on the sidewalk I decided the store is finished. I am not going back.

The courier on the motorbike took my ankle on the way out. He did not stop. I sat down on the curb with the bag in my lap and I could not breathe right for four minutes. When I finally looked there was a fresh scrape on top of the bruise that has been fading on my left ankle for a while. I bought the binder for exactly this. I did not know I was buying it for exactly this until I was already bleeding.

After the shower I ate ramyeon at the desk and I clipped the photo in. First dated entry. The barley tea went cold beside me. I did not drink it. I watered the fern and the binder is closed on the desk and my ankle is on the spare pillow right now.

Im is at my parents' apartment tonight. I know because my mother sent me a photo of Im's kimchi jjigae and did not ask how I was. Ji-seok is probably there too. I keep trying to rank what I lost and the scale does not hold. I want to be angry in a clean way. I want to be a woman who cuts people off and moves to a new city. I am a woman sitting alone documenting her own scrapes in a fresh binder. That is the sentence. That is the whole sentence.

I posted the lilac silk one in bed. Fairy lights on. Ankle cropped out, obviously. From the outside it looks like rest.