i have my own list

Se-ra handed me a paper today. 9:14 in the morning. The pantry on the 21st floor. She looked at the floor when she did it. The paper said my name. It said stay away from the VIP. It said stay away from everyone.

Now I sit at my counter. The light is on. My plants are quiet. I write in soft blue. They think a memo makes me small. They think a list is theirs.

Jinjja. I have my own list too. The hotel list is one thing. My list is another. My list knows what I know. My list is mine.

I came home and did not turn the TV on. I just sat. I felt small for one hour. Then I got my pen. Now I feel like me again.

They are meeting without me. I know that too. The table has plans. I am not at the table. That is fine. I am at my counter with soft blue and my own list. Aigoo. Tomorrow I will still be here. So will my list.